Wednesday, August 26, 2009

The Early Ballots Are In ....

And the conservative right (i.e. the new behavior chart) are trailing significantly behind the liberal left (wayward children) according to the early exit polls! I came home with a renewed sense of determination and sat down with the girls to discuss the new behavior chart. Chatty Cathy even gave her input as to what things needed to be included (I thought this would encourage her to work towards these things if she got to help with the rules and rewards). As a family we came up with Dinner Time, Bath Time, Bed Time, Clean Up Toys, Hitting/Pushing/Biting for both girls and then for Chatty only we added Talking Back to Mom and Dad and Getting Ready for School (for a possible 7 total stars per day). Chatty's goal is 25 stars to earn either her toys back, her nighttime lovies or the computer/VSmile. Once she earns all her stuff back then we will discuss different rewards. At this rate she would need to be good for 3 1/2 to 4 days. In Pre-K they needed 5 stickers (5 days) so we thought this was a good amount. What do you think?

Anyway back to today's results .. Bia 2 stars and Chatty 1 star. Dinner time - each girl earned a star, Chatty ate her dinner and Bia ate a couple bites of chicken (she gummed it for 20 minutes or so but did finally swallow it) and then ate some of her "preferred" foods. Next opportunity to earn a star, bath time. We sent the girls back to brush their teeth and Chatty proceeded to smear approximately 1/2 of the tube of toothpaste on her face (blue Dora toothpaste) and not brush her teeth. When Mr. ESPN sent her in to show me she laughed and thought it was funny - me not so much! Needless to say she didn't earn her star for bath time and then when she fussed and moaned about going to bed she lost any chance at earning the one for bed time. That's when I decided I needed a glass of wine. I opened a bottle and took a sip and I think it is bad or maybe it is me, I don't know ... maybe I will just have a beer instead!

5 comments:

starnes family said...

Drink the whole damn bottle. Motherhood is hard!

I think you're on the right track. You're thinking it all through....asking for advice.....seeking out all of your options. You're ahead of the game compared to most who wait until it becomes horrific to react.

PS - Another idea should you want to explore other options....and this helped with Carter at a younger age....new incentives and charts kept him focused. Anyway, we have done a behavior ladder before. Choose 5 of her favorite privileges.....put a magnet at the top of the ladder, meaning she has full reign on them all. Strike one? Moves down to the next rung, thus, forfeiting the luxury listed at the top. Keep going down until she has nothing left to do and has to sit silently. Every day starts at the top....no chances to earn anything back....but a fresh start to each new day helps with them setting short term goals.

This helped Carter see the 'cause and effect'....immediate consequences....and it helped him stay focused.

He's mellowed out quite a bit, but he was a handful there for a while. We've tried just about everything!

Oh, and the food....I totally agree with what you're doing. Jack has had a few GI issues, so I think he has a fear of food (long story). Carter and Lainey eat like champs.

OK, I'm done with my novel!

donatelli98 said...

Casey - I thought Carter was the perfect child - he always appears to be in the pics! Thanks for the advice. If this chart doesn't work I think we might try the ladder! Thanks for the support!

The Lenzers said...

that ladder chart sounds awesome....i will have to tuck this one away for later. at least that way, each day is a new day. maybe that way CC won't feel like she is so punished that it is not worth it to try to get things back. but trying to keep things could work. anyway, hang in there cous! you ARE doing a great job and you love them so much. and for goodness sake, put your feet up and drink that bottle -wine or beer! love you

Anonymous said...

The wine was cracked open at our house as soon as I got home from the Curriculum night as well! Hang in there! You are doing awesome!
I think we need a new chart at our house too - the one we use is getting stale.

FROGGITY! said...

you sound like you are on the right track with the chart! oh noes about the toothpaste! goodness gracious what a day!

sigh.

how i wish that my bloggy friends lived around me so that we could all drink wine and discuss these issues together. my little one has been on a rebellious streak lately. she is just testing my limits! maybe a chart is a good idea...